Funny Hat

here's an old story I had buried in my hard drive long ago. it sucks, but it's kinda cool too. I'll make it the first open source story.

[open source]


you ever have something bad happen while wearing a funny hat? you have to deal with it, you have to find some way to fix it or endure it, but all this time you're wearing a funny hat. you may not even realize that you're wearing a funny hat, but sure enough, you catch an offhand glance of yourself in a reflective surface wearing that funny hat. that stupid, funny hat. it just makes you want to crawl into a hole and die. that's how Jeff felt, the night his kidney was stolen.

the mickey he was slipped only did half it's job. sure, it immobilized him, and rendered him unable to speak. to all onlookers, he appeared to be knocked out cold. but he was somehow aware, and felt the whole thing. the whole, excruciating thing. the first stinging incision with a rusty scalpel. the cold hands reaching for the desired organ. ripping it from his body. every single stitch to close the wound. he felt it all, but he could say nothing. he didn't ask for this, but he couldn't help but think he deserved it. sure, there were extenuating circumstances: he had an errand in San melente that he just couldn't back out on. he had long assumed Dee wouldn't want to go in on the deal with him. he had wanted her to take a piece of the action, but she wasn't interested. Jeff postulated that the reason why was probably that she was lying low for awhile after her last deal got tipped to the federales. that was alright. he reasoned that the two of them could get together on the next big score.

ah, but that afternoon before he left for san melente she did seem to take an interest. but she was grounded and he knew she had no intention of taking such a risk. hell, her involvement would put the whole deal in jeopardy. no, it was best that she stay. and besides, it was too late for her to changer her mind. he had a plane to catch, and she had no time to pack. whatever his desire, he had no choice but to leave it in her hands.

so on that fateful day, as he was walking back to his room from the warehouse in san melente where the deal had taken place he stopped into a cantina for a drink. drunk and bored, he wore a tacky souvenir sombrero he'd bought off a kid on the street who was selling them with a sad story that was too outrageous to be true. he just liked the kids effort, I guess. when his next drink came that's more or less where we came in.

days later he was back home. got a call from Dee. she did end up doing a job with some old associates after all. she said it turned out great. went off without a hitch. he didn't have the heart to tell her. there's no way she could have known. he certainly couldn't hold it against her, and he was too fond of her to burden her with pain she might of caused him. so he just congratulated her on her recent kidney smuggling venture.

he just stared at that stupid hat, the taste of copper in his mouth.